|Modern atheist or 'coincidentalist'; religo nutcase|
A man in a pub has claimed modern atheism and reliance on explaining the conspiratorial nature of governments as 'coincidences' is merely a new form of mental religion no different from the most irrational of any monolithic belief system. Billy Bleedingobvious a Professor of lager working in a research department based at the Plough pub in Bristol came to the revelation last weekend after finishing his fifth pint of Stella.
Mr Bleedingobvious went on to conclude that the high priests of this new religion are, amongst other krypto intellectuals; Jeremy Paxman, Steven Fry, Alan Moore, John Show, Richard Dawkins to name but a few of a cast of thousands and, whilst claiming to be 'atheists,' their God is any government in which they have unquestionable faith, their constant use of 'coincidence' to explain the most utterly ridiculous occurrences such as; the vapourising jet (flight 98 9/11), the indestructible passport (flight 11 9/11), the falling building 7 (9/11), the magic bullet (JFK 22/11), the sinking of the Lusitania taking US into WWI, the funding of the Nazis by Prescott Bush (grandfather of W (wanker) Bush) and the ludicrous coincidence of the 11/ 11/ 11 (official armistice date set by the Rothschilds at their palace with 11 being the central bankers number for judgement and destruction) are merely latter day miracles no less preposterous as Christ walking on water, feeding the five thousand and making the blind see again.
Placing his empty glass on the bar Mr Bleedingobvious belched loudly and concluded, 'That makes a conspiracy theorist a blasphemer, thus explaining the medieval five year jail sentence received in Germany for even questioning the holocaust figures, the TV the modern wailing wall and, seeing that those who run the central baking cartel worship Lucifer and have admitted so on numerous occasion (Albert Pike Morals & Dogma http://amazingdiscoveries.org/S-deception-Freemason_Lucifer_Albert_Pike), anyone that goes around accepting this pack of crap, including the eye of the devil printed on the back of a $1 note (world reserve currency YOUR MONEY!) not atheists but, in fact, lay satanists and I defy anyone to prove me wrong!' To which he received a rousing, 'Here here!' from all that were present who were not ignorant dickheads.