As part of a preventative programme to combat the worrying situation the doctor argued for the possible removal of matchboxes displaying warnings, reminding the user not to set fire to themselves or eat the matches.
He explained, "this is excellent example of what I mean. Instead of the stupid kid eating the matches and setting fire to himself with the last one he will see the warning and think, 'maybe not'. We could argue that, had he not been told, he would have eaten the matches and set fire to himself."
"Now, this unfortunate individual, having been given an unnatural evolutionary advantage, may well go on to cause trouble further on down the line. Imagine if this person went on to become Minister for Health and knocked over the NHS because he didn't see it.''
Jennifer Bloodsport spokeswoman for PAR; the Preservation of the Accident Prone, argued,"Dr Digsby is a neo-nazi. The severely accident prone have as much right to safety as anyone else. Just because they are in the habit of putting themselves and everyone around them in constant danger does not mean that they cannot be worthy additions to society. We are still rampantly in favour of all harm saving initiatives that help our members to avoid the hazard strewn environment of modern life, including signs above hot water taps in hotels, warning that the water could be hot."
Dr Digsby disregarded Ms Bloodsports assertions claiming, "falls, trips, the sea, fireworks and the inadvertent consumption of bleach are merely natural self-removal systems which, in turn, provide a truly safe future environment for the more naturally capable of us to prosper in."