|Delabouze; 'Smug Go Getters,' not 'Normal Human Beingz.'|
Francoise Delabouze, head of revenue streams at InBev, sneered, 'My company have not spent 50 million euros trying to convince ze UK cider drinkers zat their favourite, how do you sezs, 'tipple' is now drunk only by wealthy, young, smug, go-getters, who wear thick rimmed glasses and pretentious suits, drive E-type Jaguars and live in huge renovated barns resembling TV studios full of underwear models for nothingz. Mon Dieu! After my companies clever re-branding programmes; Cidre, as it is now pronounced, retails at £5.56p per pint, sixteen times its old value and zees cheap signs on ze side of the road allow UK drinkers to believe zat it is still nearly affordable for normal human beingz. Zis must be stopped! Immediamont!'
|Stella demand removal of roadside cider sign|