|£45 000 is a lot of cheese for the fat rat|
Chancellor George Osbourne, known to his friends and enemies alike as the fat rat, released his second budget yesterday in which he gave hard working millionaires a tax break of £45 000 a year and paid for it by taking £84 off every elderly person in the country, who he pointed out, 'just lay about all day watching Countdown and spending their enormous pensions on biscuits.'
Explaining the reasons behind the development of this fiscal policy Mr Osbourne said, 'my main concern was that I am a millionaire who will benefit handsomely from this arrangement and secondly I am not an old person struggling on a state pension. I would also like to point out that neither is anyone I know or intend to know. Good day.'
When asked if there was any other deeper financial reason for the changes the chancellor replied, 'no,' before getting into his chauffeur driven limousine and returning to his mansion which are all paid for by the hard work of the citizens of this country and that of our ancestors.