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Corbyn: This is British politics not the X-factor.
Fury As Corbyn Refuses To Sing Royal Karaoke

There has been a furious backlash against Jeremy Corbyn for refusing to sing the Queen's favourite song at a royal karaoke held recently. Corbyn said that he would not sing Elizabeth II's No.1 ditty on political grounds but that he was prepared to do a version of 'Heart of Glass' by groovy 70's punk band Blondie though only if Andy Burnham was allowed to accompany him with his famous beat box and Tom Watson did backing vocals. There was a rumour that a version of this tune would be released in time for Christmas but that unfortunately the Labour party could not decide if it was going to be a Eurobeat mix or not and that they would have to put it down to a vote.

Leading the cries of fury was outraged Baron Karl Vastrappen Glucksburg a close relative of the royals and professor of constitutional etiquette at King'c college London who blustered, "It is an outrage that this pleb refused to sing our regent's theme tune. How dare he? Who in God's name does he think's he is? This is why we have the Tower of London. To throw anti-establishment rascals like this inside."

The mild-mannered leader of the opposition calmly stated, "I should not be expected to sing on demand. This is British politics not the X-factor."

Simon Cowell, inventor of the X-factor and wildly renowned for killing music everywhere, was quick to point out, "if your career in British politics is governed by your looks, your voice and your ability to chirp out a load of bollocks that someone else writes for you then I think Mr Corbyn is in for a nasty surprise."

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