The Stuffing 'Em Post: Medaiganda

Medaiganda

Chris Evans: Leap of Respect will 'go off with a bang'

Top Gear To Jump Royal Artillery Memorial on Stunt Bike

Undaunted after receiving millions of complaints for filming car stunts in front of the country's scared cenotaph Top Gear has announced a bold new plan to jump the Royal Artillery Memorial on Hyde Park Corner on a stunt bike. Chris Evans, Top Gear's madcap, ginger, petrol-headed presenter, said. "The amazing jump will take place in May to open the show and because of the huge cannon on top, the memorial that is, we're expected the proceedings to go off with a bang. Oh yes. This is to say a big sorry to all UK troops everywhere for any misgivings they may have had over our last petrol-headed stunt at the cenotaph and that's why we've chosen to call it 'The Leap of Respect'."

When Matt LeBlanc, Top Gear's US, madcap, petrol-headed, co-presenter was asked if he thought his madcap, petrol-headed stunts were disrespectful to the soldiers who had died during the first and second world wars he said, "The what?"

Top Gear producers were said to be 'pleased' by the torrent of complaints they received over their latest planned petrol-headed stunt and defended claims that they were simply trying to generate hype for the show by upsetting as many people as possible and counter claimed, "We disagree that both our drag race past the cenotaph and our up-and-coming 'Leap of Respect' are disrespectful. Either will our stock car race around the grounds of Buckingham Palace be, where members of the royal family will make up the pit crew for the Duke of Edinburgh who will race musicians from the popular band Elbow. In episode three the public will get to see David Cameron, Boris Johnson and George Osborne in dodgem cars bashing into each other through the corridors of Westminster. Instead of pouring scorn on the establishment's long-valued traditions and sense of decorum whilst making our political leaders the subjects of ridicule, it will make our institutions seem accessible, whilst reminding BBC's viewers that our betters are just as madcap and petrol-headed as we are."

In the news