The Stuffing 'Em Post: Westminster Village, Playground

Westminster Child Sex Inquiry Head Aileen McColgan: 'Taxi!'

Westminster Child Sex Inquiry Lawyer Exodus Inexplicably Continues

For some inexplicable reason the exodus of lawyers seeking to get as far away as humanly possible from the Westminster Child Abuse Inquiry, [IICSA], continues growing at an almost exponential rate. Aileen McColgan, Professor of Law at King's College London and overseeing the investigation into child sex allegations in the Anglican and Catholic Church, is the latest high-level lawyer to resign from the strangely troubled case and was last seen two days ago running down Whitehall apprehensively glancing over her shoulder before jumping into a black cab shouting, "Heathrow now! And don't spare the fucking horses!"

Along with Mrs McColgan, the other six other top-level barristers who have also inexplicably fled the IICSA including: Hugh Davies QC deputy counsel who ran away in Dec 2015, Toby Fisher joint first counsel who legged it in August 2015, Ben Emmerson QC lead counsel who vamoosed in September 2016, Dame Lowell Goddard heading the inquiry who sodded off back to her luxurious Knightbridge apartment paid for at the tax-payers expense in 2014, not forgetting city lawyer and Lord Major of London Fiona Woolf the second to peg it in 2013 and, last but not least, simply because there were doubtless others who went unreported, retired judge Butler Sloss who did not even sit down before she shot off as fast as a piece of warm shit from a cold shovel only two weeks into the hearings back in 2013, were all mysteriously unavailable for comment last night and hiding, for other inexplicable reasons, at various undisclosed locations. Two further lawyers at the inquiry are also rumoured to be currently squatting in their blocks and Bill Maloney, expert of shadowy pedophile cases including involving powerful diplomats (see below), predicted, "They won't be the last either."

The BBC, keen to stop the spread of what they call 'fake news' and opinions such as those of Mr Maloney freely available @ Pie & Mash Films, flimflammed, "Of course, like everything else the Beeb has ever researched, there is no way of ever knowing... anything... really... and the mysterious circumstances surrounding the reasons why so many of this countries' most trusted legal staff, and indeed those from other countries, have seen fit to up sticks and do one as fast as Phillip Green chasing after an old lady's pension are baffling. One thing's for sure, and I can say this categorically as I am a trained journalist working at the BBC; a real news outlet not like that fake conspiracy stuff on Facebook, there is no way these lawyers are scared shitless that if they carry on with this case they will be committing professionally suicide, or be forced to commit their own, because they have seen for themselves the over-whelming, incontrovertible, depraved and damning evidence of a pedophile ring operating at the heart of UK government with intimate connections to the murderous MI5 and MI6. No way. Not on my watch."